Notorious B.G.L.

I bought a dozen mini bagels from a grocery store.  (Ok, I’m back at Meijer’s.  Hey, I challenge you to live in Michigan and not go to Meijer’s at least twice a week.)  Upon toasting this morning, I noticed how big they are, not that they grew in the toaster, but they aren’t that far from a regular sized east coast bagel, more like a “4/5” than a mini.

I blame this on Zingerman’s.  Zingerman’s produces Michigan’s most famous bagel and they are the size of your head.  Once upon a time when I was in college, I lucked out in the day old bin and a six pack fed two people for a week; bagels being a densely packed carb product, it was like the volume of eating Thanksgiving dinner with each one.  And good thing they were different flavours, because too much of one flavour of a good thing might have turned me into an antibagel activist.

New York is nearly synonymous with bagels; why they call it the Big Apple I’ll never understand, since we see far more bagels than apples there.  If you’re cheap, there is a mass grocery store brand which leans on the soft and mushy side; sometimes I’m cheap.  It’s one of those things that I should probably never admit to another New Yorker.  I eat the ones off of the cart, too – I’ll just confess that now as well.  Actually, many people do; there’s a time and a place.  New Yorkers do indeed pride themselves on knowing where to get the best bagels though.  My favourite was H&H, until the entire company went down in a big scandalous blaze of glory and seemed to disappear over night.  Then after probably Ess-A-Bagel.  I was an East Sider (as compared to West Sider, the rivalry is as big as Michigan vs Ohio) and it was arguably the best on the East Side.  For hosting smaller guests, I discovered that Fairway does a very good mini; these were equivalent in flavour and come in as many varieties as the regular ones, but are half the size.  I wish I could line them up, making a bagel size chart for you to see.  Starting from the Fairway mini right up to Zingerman, which can be used as a car tyre replacement should you find that necessary after driving to Kerrytown.

As a postscript, Meijer does an ok bagel.  It’s bakeryish rather than mass factoryish, and one is sufficient for an entire meal.  And while I have eaten frozen in a totally past life, holding on to my New Yorkness, I refuse to go down that path as of yet.